Thursday 14 May 2015

I've been fucking around while you've been saving the world

Hey dudes! It is I, your favourite trashcan of the internet. I can't believe so much time has passed since my last post. I have been consumed with exam stress, procrastination of the most intense kind and generally trying to keep my head above water.


So much has happened, and I feel a little mad at myself for not updating it all here. I'm so jealous of you guys who post continually with the things going on in your lives! Well done! Instead I seem to just let it all build up and then try and condense it into one massive, dense post. Oops. 
As I have admittedly said before, I think (for real this time k) that from now on I'll be able to post more. My final exam is tomorrow; advanced higher English (what was that about procrastination?) and after that I have two weeks left of 'study leave' where the only thing I'm going to be studying is how to sleep for as long as possible. I'm planning to get a few more rolls of film developed as well as shooting a film I'm starting to write with a friend of mine so hopefully it should actually be moderately productive.
After my study leave is over, that's nearly it for me, secondary education-wise. We come back for the sixth year fortnight, which entails the leavers ball, a trip to alton towers and several lectures on how to survive in the outside world, but after that - freedom. I can't quite comprehend it really - school has consumed such a massive chunk of my life that it unnerves me slightly that soon I will be done with it. I feel a bit lost really; I have enjoyed the structure that school has brought but also have wanted to be done with all the deadlines and pressure for so long now. 

Next year, as I'm quite young and not really sure of where I want to commit to yet, I've decided to take a year out, and I'm tentatively looking forward to it. I can't wait to have the freedom and time to try and be more creative and actually indulge myself in things like film and photography, but I'm also petrified of ending up twiddling my thumbs for twelve months whilst my parents constantly berate me for not knowing what to do with myself. I would've loved to move away and do an apprenticeship with a production company but due to my awkward birthday I'm too young for anywhere to consider me, so I'll just have to make do with what I've got. What are you guys doing next year? I always find it interesting listening to other people's plans as they vary so wildly, and they all sound so interesting.

It feels so good to write again - despite my looming exam tomorrow, I'd forgotten what personal writing was like! I need to start journalling in earnest next year I think - how cool would it be to have a tangible document written when you were in your most hormone-addled, formative periods in your life when everything's panned out? 

To all of you experiencing exam stress, I've got some sweet songs I've discovered over the past few weeks. They're so chill and great for listening to just to relax but also to low-key jam out to. I've also been taking a lot more photos on my iphone camera, as more often than not I've been coming home when the sun is beginning to set. I love this time of year as all the blossoms are out on the trees and here in Edinburgh, the sky has been clearing while the wind gradually becomes warmer. 



I've taken too many bus photos recently, but the light has been so gorgeous. I think I'll make a post with all of my recent ones soon, but looking back sometimes I worry they're a bit odd - me lurking on the back seat taking pictures of the backs of people's heads. But I think love them all the same.








Listen to this last one before you go into your exam, just to pump yourself up a bit. My friend, after being left alone to not leave her house for two weeks while she was meant to be revising, has become obsessed with kpop, specifically the group EXO. Unfortunately, she has turned me too. The choreography is so good and they're all so cute and the music is so catchy.... I am a twelve year old girl again.




Hope you guys are surviving the exam period! Summer will be here soon.
Nice to talk again, 
Kit x

5 comments:

  1. As a person who has been away from school for a year, I know it is so. easy. to fall into a sluggish routine but if you plan things then you can really put the time to good use! I hope your exam went well and good luck with the next year of freeeeedom (also, the light in the bus photo is really lovely!) x

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    1. thanks! haha I can completely believe you, I'm quite anxious about it but hopefully now I have some free time I can start to plan in earnest what I should be doing. What did you do in your year out? (if you don't mind me asking!) So few of my friends from school are doing the same as me so I'm worried I'll be lonely and a bit aimless but I think it'll force me to be less introverted and sort myself out a bit

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    2. This year I've mainly been working, volunteering and more recently started to work towards a TEFL qualification. All of that is interspersed with lots of lying on my floor and sampling various types of granola. My friends were still at school (I left in 5th year)so it was a bit different for me but the whole thing makes you feel slightly more independent! It'll be an experience, no matter what happens!

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  2. I hope your exam went well!! Also, the time after you leave school is the weirdest feeling. It doesn't really hit you that you've left until you're at a job or university and then you suddenly wonder why you aren't in compulsory education. It's good you've got some projects to do though!! And hooray for positive exam playlists (I've been listening to bizarre classical music recently to help me concentrate so this is an excellent break)

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    1. yas classical music for revision goes so hard; well, not really but figuratively, maybe. I always get distracted when I listen to good music as I listen to the lyrics too much and much prefer them over boring exam-related words. It hasn't really hit me yet that soon it'll all be over but I've been looking forward to it for a long time! My only disappointment is that I won't be moving out for at least another year, which sounds petty seeing as I'm not going anywhere new so there would be no real point but still. Independence will have to wait! I'm defo going to try keep myself busy next year or I will fall into complete inertia haha

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