tooOOoo many feelings

Hello sweeties, how is life treating you? It's currently half past midnight and a school night for me. Things are wobbly. 

It's odd. I feel like summer is brushing against my fingertips, tantalizingly close and yet still out of reach. I cannot wait for the complete absence of any responsibility whatsoever and hopefully not-awful weather. My last exam is this Friday. I hope it goes well but also I do not care at all about anything so can't wait to be done with it all. I don't get it, myself - there are too many hormones and thoughts and feelings and aches and voices whizzing around my body that I feel entirely unprepared to take exams that will define my life and make choices that are going to be my future. 

Unlike many young people and like many others, I don't really.. thrive on any of my subjects at school. There's nothing I excel at, nothing I'm known for that can be quantified or summarized with a grade on a sheet of paper. I feel intelligent, but my results don't reflect how I feel. Am I dumb, or not good at taking exams? Am I bad at most academic things, or do I set my standard unrealistically high? Am I mentally stable enough to deal with the chemicals flooding my body whilst planning my life path or will I burn out? idk.

Aside from all that Teen Angst, I made a wee playlist thing with some songs I've been obsessed with. Excuse the duvet cover that is literally older than me.

I also thought I'd document my Wreck It Journal on here that I got in London. I only started it recently but these are a couple of my favourite pages. 

This was so insanely relaxing to do. Just put on some really loud music and find a nice pen and circle stuff till your heart's content.

I also did the 'draw with glue' page. I know it's all blurry but the glitter was so pretty and looked a lot less interesting when it was completely focused. Look how calming it all looks!

Also I got these adorable shoes I gotta show you guys. They were only six quid and every time I internet window-shop I see places selling them for so much more and feel so smug.

I'm pretty sure I had a pink pair with flowers on them when I was about four but whatever, I love em.

I will always be in love with this song by Lorde, and I don't get why there isn't enough hype about it. It's not available on itunes and there are no official music videos for it. I love this one though - it's stuff like this that really hypes me up about film making and lighting and mise en scene and all that jazz.

Speaking of film making, I finally put the dumb short film we made on youtube. It's been on vimeo for a while but I think it's safe to say most people use youtube a lot more. I'm mad because I can't choose the thumbnail for some reason but I'll sort it out later. Enjoy!

it's being weird and not letting me show it as a video but here's a link mwa

Ok so before I fall asleep on my laptop, I'll see y'all later. I'm thinking 1am blogging is productive blogging. PEACE OUT

Kit x